Saturday, June 25, 2016

Spreading Support For The Bullied: Let's Go Boldly Together

Spreading Support for The BulliedLet's Go Boldly Together
Comments written on this blog are dedicated to spreading supportive, encouraging words and principles for people who stand against intimidation, harassment, or other bullying behaviors.  Bullying is problematic even if you are not the direct victim.   Bullying is troubling when you simply know some someone who is victimized.  Parents and friends of victims feel the anguish associated with bullying. We must all work together to end the detrimental effects of bullying, harassment and intimidation.  Let’s go boldly together toward creating a safer, kinder society.

Attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors evolve through societal changes, technological advances, and new ideas.  Millennials appear to have an open,  a giving spirit of inclusion and acceptance. There is hope for a better tomorrow.  However, change and innovation can also have unintended negative consequences. While most of us agree, the Internet is an amazing tool there is a downside when used improperly or maliciously.  The ability to spread hate, cyber- bullying and other forms of negative propaganda are easier, faster, and more widespread than ever before because of the Internet and communication through social media.

Unfortunately, individuals who feel isolated and excluded from peers or their community may decide to use technology as an indirect or direct tool of harassment or intimidation.   Perpetrators of large-scale acts of violence may have fallen into this disturbing pattern of unintended negative consequences of technology and the Internet.   Everyone must become aware and make an effort to connect with individuals who appear to exist on the fringes of a neighborhood, community, or society.   Let’s go boldly together in an attempt to end bullying, intimidation, and isolation of others.

There are many documented reasons individuals face intimidating and harassing acts of bullying.  The reasons bullying occurs are typically unfounded, illogical, and quite honestly rooted in cruel and mean behavior.  When surveyed, students report the reasons they were bullied as being related to their physical appearance or looks, body shape (also related to physical appearance), and race, (Davis and Nixon, 2010).  Briefly, think about these reported causes of bullying and you will understand how important body image and physical attractiveness becomes during adolescent years and beyond. Victims of bullying must feel supported by peers and responsible adults and reassured they should not be harassed or intimidated in their school or community.  Everyone has the right to coexist without the negative impact of bullying.

Peer groups may be reluctant to accept children into their social group who they perceive to be “different”.  Adults must lead the way by modeling accepting and inclusive behaviors with neighbors, co-workers, and community members. Let us go boldly together in an attempt to create a kinder gentler society that minimizes the significance of outward appearance and looks beyond obvious physical features. 

We should remain undaunted in our efforts to spread understanding and acceptance of all people.  This type of unconditional acceptance does not mean that you must retreat from personal beliefs or values but rather it requires that you demonstrate acceptance and respectful acknowledgment of the beliefs’ of others. 

Acceptance of differences is a strong start to ending many problems plaguing our immediate communities and society as a whole.  Let’s go boldly together to ensure tolerance and acceptance that will help to create a kinder, more caring community for all!

Saturday, June 11, 2016

Become An Up-stander: Take A Stand Against Bullying



   Become An Up-Stander: Take A Stand Against Bullying

Honesty, integrity, and empathy are important traits that everyone should develop and hone. There is a lot of discussion about role models especially in connection with celebrities including professional athletes, musicians, actors, and high profile individuals.  This chatter is especially noticeable when young movie or music moguls exhibit attention-getting behaviors that are not a characteristic of a positive role model. Occasionally, individuals use their powerful persona, celebrity status, and wealth to speak out against something he or she personally values as significant. This type of fearless or courageous individual is a powerful example of what it means to be unafraid to stand up for what is right.  This is an example of an Up-stander. Acting as an Up-stander, you might stand up for your personal beliefs, the rights of others, unjust or inequitable actions, or other forms of mistreatment including bullying.

There is a story of a little boy from Louisville, Kentucky who wanted to seek revenge on another child who stole his bicycle.  He told a police office, “I want to whip him”.  I can imagine that victim must have felt as though he was being bullied and needed to find way to “get even”.   According to the story, the police officer told him that he needed to be able to “whip” him using skill and fairness. I do not know if the victim ever had a chance to get even with the person who stole his bike but I believe that he may have learned a bigger more important lesson from this situation.

The police office displayed the characteristics of an Up-stander by helping the boy to find his bicycle and providing a reasoned explanation that showed him another way to respond. A caring adult provided him a positive activity by teaching him to box.  This caring action likely resonated with the child who felt that he had been wronged. The officer went beyond his professional duties to stand up for a child.  The officer became an Up-Stander.



Research indicates that victims of unchecked bullying often turn to bullying behaviors too.  Everyday thousands of schoolchildren face bullying.  Victims of bullying face the fear of name-calling, physical and verbal harassment and repeated intimidation. School personnel must be vigilante and aware of instances of bullying.  It is important to create a school culture that demonstrates caring and compassionate actions toward all of the community members. Responsible school personnel must take a stand by implementing guidelines that address and diminish bullying.

Let us return to the story of the stolen bicycle. The bicycle-theft victim was Muhammad Ali.  An Up-stander (the police officer) and other mentors (trainers, religious and civic leaders, and friends) assisted him through this incident and many other challenges.

Eventually Ali became a world-renown boxer arguably the greatest, of the twentieth century. His notoriety and fame was not without controversy. He took unpopular political, social, and religious stands based on personal convictions and principles. He took a stand not only of himself but also for others who were not able to speak out.  Ali became an Up-stander. 



I encourage everyone to stand against bullying. Become an Up-stander for victims of bullying in your school, neighborhood, and community.